We’ve all heard the phrase “helicopter parents.” This term, coined in the 1980s, has been used for many decades to describe the overprotective, overinvolved parents that were common at the time. However, a new type of parenting style has become the latest concern: snowplow parents.
What Is Snowplow Parenting?
Snowplow parenting, also known as lawnmower parenting, is when parents remove all obstacles, discomforts and challenges from a child’s life. They actively “clear the path” so life is seamless and easy. While this may come from a place of love, it has detrimental effects on the child. The child won’t know how to deal with conflict or challenges, so they’re less resilient when encountering obstacles. As these children grow into adults and enter the real world, they find navigating typical problems overwhelming.
Some of the common characteristics of snowplow parents are:
- They do everything for their child instead of allowing the child to become independent. As the child grows into a teenager, they might not know simple but critical life skills such as cooking or doing laundry.
- They often can’t say no to their children’s wishes. Anything the child asks for, they receive.
- They micromanage everything about the child’s life. Instead of allowing the child to decide for themselves their interests or preferences, the parent chooses what extracurricular activities and hobbies the child can do.
- They assume their child can do no wrong and will, without question, defend their child from blame.
- They’re often overprotective because they fear their child will get hurt. So anything that’s seen as a slight risk isn’t allowed, such as sleepaway camps, higher-risk sports like skiing or even going to parties with friends.
- They often pressure their child to excel in school and extracurricular activities. They’ll do everything possible to help their child get ahead in these areas, such as doing homework for them, hiring tutors and coaches and trying to influence coaches or teachers.
- They often fight their children’s battles to make things as easy as possible for their kids. An example of this would be if the child is being teased at school. Rather than teaching the child how to react appropriately to the teasing, the parent may simply take the problem to the other parent and demand intervention.
- They don’t encourage their children to take responsibility, and if their child does something wrong, they don’t enforce consequences.
The Effects of Snowplow Parenting
Unsurprisingly, snowplow parents aren’t having the best impact on their children. Kids who grew up in this overly supportive, controlling and “make things easy” environment tend to have the following issues:
- Lack of resilience
- Poor problem-solving skills
- Poor decision-making skills
- Low self-efficacy, which can lead to low self-esteem and depression
- Difficulties dealing with frustration
- Increased anxiety
- Difficulty with friend and partner relationships
- Overdependence on parents
Trends in parenting styles often result from the world around us. Helicopter parents initially arose in the 1980s when there was an increasing panic around drugs, crime and child safety, so parents responded with increasing involvement.
Helicopter parenting dropped off a bit after many realized the negative impact it can have on children. And then snowplow parenting arose.
Some mental health experts argue that snowplow parents have come about as a result of increased anxiety levels. An estimated 31.1% of American adults will experience anxiety at some point in their lives.
Dr. Carla Naumburg, a clinical social worker, says, “This generation of parents — whether we want to call them snowplow, helicopter or lawnmower — is parenting in an age of anxiety. There is the 24-hour news cycle and social media reminding us of everything terrible that’s happening in the world.
Snowplow Parents and The Mental Health Impact on Gen Zers
One particular generation that grew up with snowplow parents and is seeing the effects now as adults is Gen Z. A Generation Z adult is someone who was born between 1997 and 2012. They’re often called “digital natives” because they grew up surrounded by the internet, which means they were also raised by parents exposed to the internet.
The effects of snowplow parenting on Gen Zers have become especially clear as these individuals enter the workforce. Employers had the following to say about Gen Z recent graduates as employees in recent research:
- 1 in 5 had a prospective employee bring a parent to an interview
- 58% found them unprepared for the workforce
- 53% said recent college grads struggle with eye contact
- 21% said candidates refused to turn on cameras for video interviews
- 63% said new grads can’t handle their workload
Whether they’re a victim of helicopter parenting or snowplow parenting, these generations are struggling to cope at work and beyond.
Steps Parents Can Take to Foster Resilience
Parents want what’s best for their children. And while snowplow parenting might come from a place of good intentions, it still can have harmful consequences. Parents who suspect they might be snowplow parents (or helicopter parents) need to learn how to strike a balance between support and encouraging independence.
Here are some ways you can encourage your children to grow up resilient and self-sufficient:
- Encourage your child to make connections with others so they can learn empathy and listening skills.
- Teach self-care so your child can learn the value of taking responsibility for themselves.
- Help your child set realistic goals so they can work toward them and feel proud when they achieve them.
- Teach your children that failing at something is part of trying and evolving. Help them adopt a growth mindset so they understand there’s always an opportunity to learn and try again.
- Help your child develop coping skills so they can cope with stress.
- Encourage problem-solving in your child, and avoid always stepping in with suggestions or advice.
Even if you suspect you are currently or have been a snowplow parent, it’s not too late to change. There’s no such thing as a perfect parent, and every mother and father have room to grow in their parenting approach.
As a parent, your job is to prepare your child for the real world so they can succeed in it. They’ll experience challenges and problems in life, but they’ll know how to persevere if you teach them resilience early on. If your child sees that you believe they can do things, they’ll believe in themselves, too.
It’s also important to take a moment and ask yourself why you’ve felt the need to be overinvolved and overprotective of your kid(s). If anxiety or unresolved childhood traumas is the reason, talking to a mental health professional can help. After all, you’re the best parent possible when you’ve properly cared for yourself.
Anxiety & Mental Health Treatment at Restore
If you’re struggling with your mental health, consider seeking professional treatment. Restore Mental Health is one of Florida’s top mental health and substance abuse treatment centers. We know every patient has unique needs, so we offer personalized treatment plans that cater to your situation. Contact us today to learn more about our mental health programs.
