Every relationship comes with its own set of complications, but if you or your partner has bipolar disorder, it may cause a lot of emotional turbulence. Not knowing what to expect on a daily basis or how to communicate with your partner are the top reasons why bipolar relationships fail. Understanding this mental health condition, why your partner experiences certain behaviors and what you can do to help can lead to a healthier, more stable relationship for both partners.
What Does Bipolar Disorder Look Like?
Bipolar disorder is a mental illness characterized by sudden changes in mood, energy, concentration and activity level. People with the disorder typically experience periods of uncharacteristic behaviors that may cause undesirable or harmful effects, intense emotions and disrupt daily functioning. These periods are called mood episodes, and they can involve either manic or depressive symptoms.
Manic symptoms can include:
- Feeling extremely high, elated, irritable or touchy
- Feeling wired or more active than usual
- Excessive appetite for food, sex, drinking or other pleasurable activities
- Feeling unusually powerful or important
- Racing thoughts and talking fast about many things
- Decreased need for sleep
Depressive symptoms can include:
- Feeling extremely down, sad or anxious
- Trouble concentrating or making decisions
- Lack of interest in most activities
- Talking very slowly and feeling forgetful
- Feeling restless or slowed down
- Feeling hopeless or worthless
- Thoughts of death or suicide
It’s also possible for people with bipolar disorder to have mixed episodes, meaning they experience manic and depressive symptoms simultaneously. Sometimes people also experience less severe manic periods referred to as hypomanic episodes. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, about 2.8% of the American adult population is affected by bipolar disorder.
Types of Bipolar Disorder
There are three types of bipolar disorder, all involving distinct changes in mood, activity levels and energy. Each type is defined by the severity of symptoms:
- Bipolar I disorder: Manic episodes that last at least 7 days and depressive episodes that last at least 2 weeks. Severe manic symptoms sometimes require immediate hospitalization, depending on the person.
- Bipolar II disorder: A pattern of depressive and hypomanic symptoms less severe than manic episodes in Bipolar I disorder.
- Cyclothymic disorder: Recurrent hypomanic and depressive symptoms that aren’t as intense or persistent as full hypomanic and depressive episodes.
Reasons Why Bipolar Relationships Fail
Living with bipolar disorder can already be difficult without the stress of a relationship. Being able to identify bipolar disorder relationship patterns can contribute to a healthier, more satisfying partnership. There are a few reasons why bipolar relationships fail without the proper treatment or communication between partners.
Unpredictable Moods and Behaviors
Fluctuating between manic and depressive episodes can make it difficult to form a stable bipolar disorder relationship. For example, manic episodes may induce pleasure seeking behaviors, including excessive drinking, spending or partying. Depressive episodes can cause an individual to withdraw from their partner or seem as if they don’t care about the relationship. These mood changes can be challenging for both the person with bipolar disorder and their partner and may create conflict within the relationship.
Intimacy
Hypersexuality during a manic episode is common for people with bipolar disorder. Your partner may initiate intimacy more than usual. Individuals may also engage in reckless behavior, such as unprotected sex or extramarital affairs. People with bipolar disorder in relationships may commit infidelity due to impaired judgment, poor impulse control, high self-esteem and feeling invincible.
During a depressive episode, your partner may experience a lack of interest in sex completely. This can cause confusion or painful feelings of rejection, especially after increased sexual activity during a manic episode.
Work
Work performance can also be affected by bipolar disorder. Depressive symptoms, such as disinterest or low energy, and manic symptoms, like poor impulse control, can make it difficult to stay productive and maintain a job. Stress at work may also worsen symptoms, causing your partner to feel overwhelmed. If your partner cannot hold a job, they may not be able to contribute financially, putting more pressure on you to pay the bills.
Parenting
Parenting can be a stressful job without the effects of a mental health condition. Erratic behavior caused by bipolar disorder may be confusing to children and create an unstable household where they won’t always know what to expect. Helping your partner acquire the proper treatment, such as therapy and medication, can produce a more secure home environment to raise children.
How to Manage the Bipolar Relationship Cycle
If you have bipolar disorder and are worried it may be affecting your relationship, being honest with your partner and explaining your condition is critical. If you’re in a relationship with someone with bipolar disorder, understanding the condition can help you care for your partner and yourself. There are a few ways to work through the disorder as a couple.
Couples Counseling
Couples counseling can be beneficial for maintaining a healthy, stable relationship with your partner, especially if they were recently diagnosed. Counseling can be used to address your partner’s past hurtful or offensive actions and be honest about how they made you feel. You can also set boundaries or goals and determine the best way to move forward together.
Self-Care
It’s important to take care of your mental and physical well-being when caring for someone with a mental illness. Try engaging in activities that make you feel calm or happy, such as attending a yoga class, taking daily walks or seeing a therapist alone. Even though you want to support your partner, taking time for yourself is just as important.
Mental Health Treatment
Professional treatment can be the best way to manage bipolar disorder symptoms and regulate mood swings. Being involved in your partner’s treatment can help you gain a better understanding of the illness, learn to spot signs of impending episodes and provide additional insight for the doctor. It can also teach you how to become a better support system.
If you or your partner is experiencing symptoms of bipolar disorder, Restore offers a variety of treatment programs that can help. Contact us today to learn more about what you can do to improve your mental well-being and get a personalized treatment plan.
