Early in 1980, a woman named Carole Ann Boone took advantage of an obscure Florida law to marry the man she loved in court by making a public declaration on the record. He accepted, and the two had a daughter in 1982. The man Boone married was recently convicted serial killer Ted Bundy, who had called her as a character witness during the proceedings that would later sentence him to death for multiple murders. Carole wasn’t the only woman to pursue Bundy. Many others started showing up to court, attempting to get his attention. The phenomenon of hybristophilia, or attraction to criminals, is well-documented. But what is it that causes so many women to be drawn to individuals with a criminal history?
The reasons that people find criminals and violent or abusive individuals alluring are complex. Read on to learn about this phenomenon and how people can manage their feelings.
Why Am I Attracted to Criminals?
The women who competed outside the courtroom for Ted Bundy’s affection were not alone. Almost every high-profile serial killer or other psychopathic criminal eventually gets fan mail from people who claim to be in love with them. Psychologists call this phenomenon hybristophilia, which can be defined as feeling romantic or sexual arousal for criminals or an act of crime in itself.
While the phenomenon of people seeking the attention of violent and dangerous criminals may seem odd, it’s actually surprisingly common. According to research done by Chloe de Oliveira and Juan-Pablo Robledo, published in the journal Deviant Behavior, prison workers often develop attachments with inmates, and also show signs of what the researchers refer to as “rescuer syndrome”, hoping to reform the offender by caring for them.
Is Hybristophilia a Mental Disorder?
At first glance, it’s tempting to write off this behavior as a symptom of mental illness, but it isn’t that simple. Technically, hybristophilia is not a mental disorder in itself but a condition known as a paraphilia, or fetish. When someone has a paraphilia, their sexual desires are diverted into unusual or inappropriate avenues. Often, this involves a person developing a fixation on an object or set of conditions for arousal, such as wearing certain fabrics, role-playing with a partner or watching certain types of media that may or may not be explicitly pornographic.
In severe cases, a paraphilia can interfere with normal arousal patterns and prevent healthy adult relationships from forming. At lower levels, however, they’re commonly known as “kinks” and may be processed as private preferences that don’t have larger consequences for the person’s normal life.
Because it affects a person’s choice of partner, hybristophilia is more consequential than liking scented candles or wearing latex. People with this condition may privately fantasize about relationships and/or sex with criminals or consume media stories about widely publicized crimes and the people who commit them. In extreme cases, they might engage in increasingly risky behavior to find a person who matches their fantasy. A person with hybristophilia might make major life decisions, such as taking a job in corrections or proposing marriage to a convicted murderer, in an attempt to satisfy their urges.
What Is a Mental Disorder?
This returns to the question of whether hybristophilia is a mental illness. According to mental health authorities, a mental disorder is characterized by clinically significant disturbances in a person’s perception of reality, ability to think, regulation of emotions or behavioral output. When the disturbance rises to the point that it interferes with a person’s ability to live a normal life, most clinicians are prepared to diagnose a mental illness. To do this, doctors and therapists in the United States typically consult the Diagnostic Statistical Manual (DSM-5-TR) to stay up to date on the most current research into conditions and diagnostic criteria.
At Restore Mental Health, we provide support to people living with a variety of mental disorders. If a disorder is interfering with a person’s personal or professional life, our counselors can offer assistance with managing it.
Does Hybristophilia Meet the Criteria for Mental Illness?
There isn’t a consensus about whether hybristophilia is or should be classed as a mental illness or a symptom of illness in itself. This is partly because of the limited amount of research on the phenomenon as opposed to, for instance, schizophrenia or bipolar disorder. It’s also controversial because of the differing degrees of severity the condition can develop into.
The case of Carole Ann Boone, who publicly agreed to marry a man who assaulted and murdered sorority girls with exceptional cruelty, is rather extreme. Most hybristophiliacs don’t engage in such extreme or risky behaviors. In fact, an unknown number of people may secretly fantasize about crime and criminals without ever letting on. For these people, the paraphilia has little or no impact on their lives, which makes it difficult to justify a formal diagnosis of mental illness.
Why Are Women Attracted to Serial Killers?
There’s no single reason why hybristophilia develops. Like most paraphilias, it’s thought that several factors could be involved in the development of the condition, including:
Genetics
Hybristophilia is an overwhelmingly feminine condition, with hardly any male subjects showing signs of it. One explanation for this could be the evolved preference of women for strong, protective men. Violent or controlling behavior can be mistaken for these positive traits. While a woman’s healthy attraction to certain types of men would normally stop short of abusive and dangerous criminals, outliers will feel attraction beyond the tolerance point most women have for aggressive behavior.
Childhood Trauma
A case can be made for a person’s childhood environment triggering hybristophilia, though no conclusive link has ever been established. A woman who was abused or neglected as a child may develop an unhealthy attraction to violent or abusive men as an adult. In extreme cases, this could manifest as a sexual attraction to killers and other predatory criminals. Helping adults process trauma from their childhood is one of the things the counselors at Restore Mental Health can assist with.
Social Factors
It’s also possible that social conditioning relates to hybristophilia. After pictures of Ted Bundy’s victims were printed in the papers and shown on TV, a number of people commented that they all had a similar look, with long brown hair parted in the middle and large hoop earrings. Before long, women started styling themselves in this way and visiting the courthouse. At least one of these women admitted to a reporter that she had dyed her hair to more closely resemble one of Bundy’s victims. This may be attention-seeking behavior for some, irrational acting out for others, or even simply thrill-seeking behavior.
What Can Be Done?
Hybristophilia can have devastating consequences for the women who have it and carry things too far. Consistently seeking out violent partners not only puts them and their children at risk; it also potentially creates a partner in crime for men who are set apart by their ability to manipulate and hurt other people.
At the low end, where hybristophilia manifests as a private sexual fetish, harm is not typically done. But for women who actively seek out the most attractive criminals they can find and put themselves in harm’s way to be with them, a strong family and peer support network, willingness to communicate and management of other emotional disorders the woman might have are key to limiting the damage hybristophilia can cause.
Restore Mental Health supports people who are struggling with unwanted thoughts or fixations. If you’re struggling with attractions that you feel may be unhealthy, contact us today to book a confidential consultation.
Frequently Asked Questions
What Are the Risk Factors For Hybristophilia?
Women are more likely to experience hybristophilia than men, and it’s thought that people who have experienced childhood trauma may be more likely to be drawn to aggressive, violent or controlling behaviors in their adult partners.
Does Being Attracted to Criminals Mean There’s Something Wrong With Me?
Hybristophilia is a common phenomenon and is not necessarily a sign of mental illness. Many women are drawn to criminals, perhaps because of their perceived strength or the excitement of social taboos. As long as the attraction remains a fantasy and doesn’t interfere with normal relationships, it’s not unhealthy.
Can Hybristophilia Be Cured?
Working with a therapist can help people experiencing an attraction to criminals understand and recognize their urges. This makes it easier to redirect them and reduce the likelihood of them turning into risk-seeking or potentially dangerous behaviors.
